I found this letter that mom wrote on her old Dell computer hard drive. For some reason I think it is very funny. It reminds me of the old joke about the man at Yankee Stadium who keeps missing key plays in the game because he hears someone yelling, “Hey! Bob!” until he finally screams back, “Goddammit! My name’s not Bob!”


June 11, 2009

Mr. Alex Sink
Florida Department of Financial Services
Bureau of Unclaimed Property
P.O. Box 1910

Dear Mr. Sink,

I have been receiving these letters for nine years. I have repeatedly indicated that Daniel Lawrence Gagner is not a relative of mine or any other member of my family.

If Mr. Gagner is alive and eligible to receive unclaimed property, you should be looking for him in another venue.

I have never opened one of your letters, but I have repeatedly written notes on the outside of the envelopes stating that Daniel Gagner is not residing at this address and is not a relative of ours. I have asked the post office to redirect the letters to the appropriate party.

Please stop sending letters to Daniel Gagner at this address. Just because our names sound alike does not mean that we are related. If, however, you can prove that there is a family connection and there is something of value belonging to the GAGNES, please address the next letter to:

The Gagne Residence

Thank you for sending a response to this letter indicating that you have determined that there is no family relationship (or that there is a family relationship) and that we can settle the matter once and for all.


Kathleen A. Gagne and Family