Here is a fragment of a journal entry I wrote on November 11th, 2011:
I called my mom this morning and talked to her for the whole drive from Starbucks to the office. It was as sad as sad can be. I sort of snapped at her right off the bat for pretending to not recognize my voice. For the last 6 or 12 months, every time I call she acts as if she has no idea who I am at first until I tell her. This morning I told her it was insulting and hurt my feelings and she told me she’d stop doing that. We’ll see…
The rest of the conversation was as frustrating as any other lately. She doesn’t make a ton of sense and can’t really communicate. I’d ask a question and she’d forget what the question was by the time she was 1/2 a sentence into her answer, then she’d trail off or just change the topic altogether without acknowledging it at all. So it’s very frustrating / heartbreaking to talk to her.
She seemed groggy, as if she had only just gotten out of bed, and, in fact, she said that she had only just woken up. Unfortunately she is not reliable any more, there is no reason to believe anything she says because she had no concept of reality.
I asked her repeatedly if she had any plans for the day. Aside from telling me multiple times that she had only just gotten out of bed, even though it was 10:30 am for her — she couldn’t describe anything other than “reading the Bible.” When I pulled into the parking lot here at work, I asked her what part of the Bible she’s reading and she said, “Joshua”.
David Gagne