I need to talk to Susan about catastrophizing. I know that my feelings are being colored by hours & hours of watching the WTC news and concern for the future. I know I’m certainly only one of millions. I can hear it in David’s voice — what I wouldn’t give to see his face, his eyes, hear his voice, and I know Jen is really hurting, missing him. It would be good for her if he was close by.

I’ve never talked to anyone about my fears for Jen. I really need to now. I need to deal with this, with the words I can’t even speak. I really hope Susan has an answer. I do know I think about it more in very stressful times. Maybe it’s not so much related to Jen as to me.

I need to take this journal with me Wednesday and to remember this page.

I spoke with Mom for a long time today and it was very depressing. She’s miserable and I can’t fix it. And what will my kids think of me?

Jen & I went to a candlelight service for WTC victims, met Hollie & went out to eat. I’m glad we went together. Jen, my love.
Kathleen A. Gagne