I’ve been out of work for almost seven months. I think I’m changing, inside, learning better how to deal with life and stress. Maybe.

Running out of money again. Even after getting $2338 back from taxes. Owe all my big bills plus $1047 for property tax, $392 for homeowners insurance.

All that’s on the table is a $30,000 yr. job with the schoolboard, a collections job repossessing cars, and an interview with the Director of Aviation at the airport.

I’m lonely. I wish I had a man in my life. Mostly just to talk to, maybe to cuddle once in a while.

My ankles aren’t swollen anymore. Lost about 12 lbs. and feeling okay about doing it slowly. Really want to crack 260 this week so I can try to lose 10 lbs. and get below 250 next.

Missing David terribly. It’s been five months, and, then, if he comes, it’ll be a big rush and trying to get in a million hours all at once.

I wish I could fly. I would find a way to go to see him.

I need to deal with fear.

Allergies are awful. I hope that’s all that’s causing the digestive, etc. problems I’m having. No money to have it checked.

Damn. I wish I could find a good job that pays “fairly” well. I hate always being broke. Wish I had saved more while I was at Cox

I worked on my book all afternoon. Need to write something tomorrow & check out other jobs.

Need to walk & move.

I’m lonely. I don’t know what I would do without Jen right now.

But we both need more.

I wish love for her, the love of a wonderful, incredible man who will be her soul mate and always, always appreciate what a precious jewel she is!
Kathleen A. Gagne