Jen and I went to Daytona for my birthday last Saturday. We stayed overnight at a Days Inn and got up and went for a walk on the beach. It was great and funny. Two women came up to us and offered us $50 if we listened to a time share presentation. We went, and […]
Ghandi said, “In the midst of darkness, light persists.” Kathleen A. Gagne Mom wrote this journal entry the day before her 53rd birthday. As far as I can tell, it’s all she wrote that day.
Went for the biopsy today. It wasn’t bad but it was a lot more complicated and real than I had expected. Got some good stuff from Susan. I was wondering — why have I always had so much trouble figuring out what I want to do or what would make me happy? What is that […]
Went to Daytona with Jen. It’s really great to have the time with her and to see Nic & Amber, but Mom can get so nasty sometimes. It’s as if all she ever wants to do is tell me all the bad things in her life. And she seems mad. I guess it could be […]
I need to talk to Susan about catastrophizing. I know that my feelings are being colored by hours & hours of watching the WTC news and concern for the future. I know I’m certainly only one of millions. I can hear it in David’s voice — what I wouldn’t give to see his face, his […]
Another day of watching the horror in New York City. And now they are talking to victims and victim’s families. People are crying, and there is anger and fear and confusion. How sad that only a few people (less than 20 it seems) could destroy so much. Three or four more buildings collapsed. The fire […]
After Jen called to wake me up, I was sitting in bed watching MTM, and David called and asked me if I was watching TV. He sounded funny, so I immediately thought of earthquake (there had been one in L.A. the other day). But when I turned to the news, I saw a jetliner crashing […]
It’s been a rough week — lots of fears, lots of immobility, lots of eating and feeling lonely. Sometimes I feel as if I’m learning all kinds of things and changing — working to get better while accepting myself more. Other times I feel stuck, as if I physically can’t move forward or ahead, and […]
Seems like it’s been a long, sort of lonely day. I ate junk all day, too, and spent too much money, and my head felt funny. Jen called, so that was a bright spot. I guess they got tickets to the game. The Gators won and looked great and will probably stay at #1. I […]
Got my sinuses x-rayed. Talking to Dic helps, and I’m thinking it’s allergies, but worried as usual. Remembered what Mike said and used the affirmation. Walking into Wal-Mart, told myself I was going to figure out what I’m “supposed” to do. It is amazing, but, like realizing my self-esteem has or should have no link […]